We keep smiling and waving like it is the greatest thing in the world.

“Hey Mom? Mom, it’s Me! Did you miss me since the last time I came around!”?

Smile and wave.

“Here I am again!”
“Hi mom!”

But then we barf. And cry because we think it is a bad thing. Like it matters.

And it does not matter.

No, it does not really matter. Sure I have puke all over my shoes and the now crusty puke particles in my hair highlight my youthfulness and the fact that everything seems to freakin’ amazing.

“Hi Mom.”

Yes, everything is just wonderful. We smile, cheer, wave and laugh our asses off.

But then we crash.

Some little bit of reality hits us in the stomach and we throw-up all over ourselves trying to make sense of the dizzying world around us.

My friend Potsy died.

He was 21.

The Merry-Go-Round was extra sweet for him. He loved to laugh, have fun and he seemed to know how to truly enjoy life. And then for no reason the music stopped.

And I threw up all over myself.

But life goes on. And as it goes on my server when it crashed and I lost my website. My tribute to Potsy got erased with it. And so here I go. I continue on. Living but not understanding how Potsy did such a good job of it.